may it be

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u knoe wat are the things dat mk ur day when everythin else sux?

its the ppl ard u.

like when i had a chat with benny aft tax plannin class. no hard feelins left from Yr 1, juz easy conversation with sm crap. reallie good feelin.

den like when this gal in my nego class offered me her chicken chop. i onli worked with her once for an in-class exercise, den she suddenly offered me i felt so touched. haha im easily touched.

meetin king ho along the corridors. haha alwayz fun to meet him cos we alwayz crap, realli juz mks me happier.

crappin with renny as well. tryin to find a christian name for hy, gg online to check names, talkin abt ‘well done, medium and rare’, and abt cars that hv ‘bird shit gao gao’. haha

and last whole wk was realli shitty. but little conversations reallie made my day. like when i had to go to the library cos the cockanaden had to find his stupid cost of equity and i met sam and we chatted. (yes i threw my grp mates away for a guy! haha) den when i was gonna print stuff and met wenyun. sam is alwayz worried dat im stressed or smthin with sch work. and i nv knew i could crap so much with wenyun; almost an hr on the stair case! ven was close to killin me haha.

and of course the ppl dat i knoe. the PEOPLE who obviously CANNOT READ ENGLISH and still msg me even tho my MSN nick says specifically not to msg me unless u can help, which, if u are askin abt comm svc, doesnt count towards helpin me u fart! but yes, darrell and ivan, for puttin up with my whining and complainin abt the cockanaden and for encouragin me thru out the nite and earli in the mornin; fart for puttin up with my attitude when u asked me abt comm svc haha; amanda! :heart1 ya sweetheart! u aso muz jia you with ur practicum!!

think a lot of ppl are not hvin very gd times in sch as well, but i’ve been too busy with CORPSE reportin to check in on them. will get in touch with u guys sooN k!! hang in there, term gonna end liaoz!!

aniweas corporate tax plannin quiz tmrw. sigh. hope i will at least pass. dun wanna get into trouble with the prof; think she dislikes me as it alrdy. cheryl nv email me her qns leh..so disappointed. hai. aft tmrw finally can hv a short break!! hv to start muggin for exams soon grrrr.

*lookin forward to more crappin sessions tmrw!!* :wink1

pls pls pls

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xuannie is still in sch! omg. she muz be rushin corp aso. im so screwed. do u think i wld hv to stay this late tmrw? or thurs nite? omg i reallie hope not. issit dat bad? would we not finish? wat do we hv to put inside our report? did we miss anythin? wat are the rest doin? is wat we are doin correct? now im startin to feel scared. not reallie stressed, juz scared.

feelin troubled aso. i hate conflicts but i think i hv to deal with one tmrw.

hai. its gonna be a long day tmrw. reallie hope dat i can finish CORPSE reportin on time and dun hv to stay so late tmrw nite. pls pls pls. pray for me man. pray dat i will pass my coy law tmrw. pray dat i can finish my corpse. pray dat i dun hv to stay late. pray dat everythin will go well. omg.

gone with the wind again

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aww man, one wk break juz flew past like that. and i slacked thru it all!! feel so guilty man..everyone seems to be super enthu abt studyin, gg all the way back to sch to study!! *gasp* wats gg on?!

aniweas..i slacked thru it..tried to do my 4 journals..and now dat the break wk has gone, i realised dat i actualli hv a lot of shit to do. and i kept thinkin im quite free so i slacked the break away. wth. :eek1

had A LOT of problems with the journals. first i had trouble tryin to decide wat to write abt. the subject was so wide, i cldnt seem to be able to narrow it down. den once i got the topic, had to research a little to add more credibility and aso for my own knowledge so that i could crap more. den there was the problem of tryin to meet the word limit, and the problem of concluding the whole paper. crapshitcurryfishhead.

thanx to the angels who helped me – darrell, ivan, damon and jolyn :beam1 dunno what i would hv done without u guys..helpin me to think of topics, givin me ur input, help me to talk crap so dat i can meet the word limit! :heart1

actualli i felt so useless aft i finished the journals. i mean, the journals was reallie mainly juz talkin crap leh. and i realised dat aft not doin this kinda stuff (writing essays) for so long, i reallie lost my skill to crap. so sad. i was desperately tryin to think of pts to say, hence i’m reallie grateful to those who helped me crap. hai. den aso the way i formulated my thoughts and organized the paragraphs in the journals were reallie bad aso. hw did i pass GP and lit? useless. lost my writing skills, and suck in acctin. wth am i doin in life?
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Dotty Zoo!

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so last fri was kaiyi’s bday celebration. quite fun lah, seein everyone again. and the turnout this time around was a little betta den durin ivan’s bday, so dat meant dat i got to meet more ppl from the class and did a lot more interaction so i was quite happy. hehe kaiyi machiam like gettin married lydat. change clothes twice and her bday cake was 2-tiered! i preferred her second outfit betta..first one abit too spotty haha. the cake looks and tastes good!! hehe even got butterfly on top one yeh..aiya i follow her dress code aso got no extra prize! haha..bugged the hell out of a lot of ppl to follow the dress code aso haha so quite fun to see everyone follow the dress code. man i had to tk 2 buses back home. same like everyone else lah. but it was times like dat when i missed the jx and eugene. haha actualli i miss their cars more lah wahahah. so u get wat i mean rite? hehe

aniweas Sat was spent at the zoo!! so fun man! so long nv go zoo liaoz..i think a lot of singpaporeans onli go to zoo when they were young..den like hundred yrs later IF they hv kids den they will go zoo again. aniweas when i woke up on Sat, it was rainin!! omg perfect weather for sleepin man. shite. den nxt thing i knew, i kan cheong spider liaoz. cos i or rather we, din hv a plan for wet weather!! shite felt so lousy dat i din plan properly. luckily i din do programs for the camp man. reallie felt like kickin myself in the foot for forgettin such an impt aspect. so i had to kan cheong kan cheong call jinda n mag for the wet weather games dat they had for the camp last yr. i stupidly forgot dat i had a copy in my lappie. kept thinkin i onli got the printouts which were not with me. aniweas luckily the rain stopped when we reached the zoo. but it was still quite jiak lat to handle all the noisy 25 kids and mk sure everythin runs well. it was made worse when HY was late cos she was waitin for YT to finish her interview and could onli meet me at the zoo. so left me and karen to handle everythin lor. luckily had the other volunteers like jason who helped out as well.

actualli the prog for the zoo was kinda redudant. dun think everyone reallie kept to it. and the original plan of hvin everyone stick close together din tk place and everyone moved at their own pace. i din reallie interact much or well with the kid i was assigned too. cos he was a very quiet boy! so shy man..and abit like dan xiao lydat..and i was aso abit frazzled from tryin to handle all the details and mkin sure that everyone was alrite.

haha but it was reallie fun to go back and relive my childhood even if i dun realli rem the time i spent at the zoo when i was young. OH! i rem the baby chicks! so i was quite sad dat they were no longer around this time. i was so lookin forward to cradlin them in my hands again :pout1 but i had fun watchin the sea lion show and sm farm show! animals so cute!! hope every1 enjoyed the trip man..at least at the end i got to eat my KFC and Ben & Jerry’s!! woo hoo!! so hungry man..din hv lunch..i wanted to grab every single meal at KFC!! haha. den finally ate B&J aft dat..so pig rite? dublin mudslide in a choc-chip cone! yummy!! shld hv juz gone for a plain cone actualli, and gone for a double scoop instead like Nick’s!! so many flavours there i din knoe wat to choose!! ahhh!! i wanna go back to zoo juz for the ice cream!! :beam1

Constantine!!

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Tues 22nd Feb 2005

went back to NY!! felt sooo gd to see the teachers again, even if there were onli 2 left. sadly. and even tho i saw them last aug, i still missed them! and it’s a lot more fun to meet them when u hv 2 other crappy ppl with u – shiuan and ting. haha. di’s presence was sorely missed. but ya it was fun to crap with boo and AT, and fun to see boo and AT suan each other haha. we had lunch in sch and too bad couldnt stay to sit in boo’s class. had to rush off to watch *drumrol*……CONSTANTINE!!

ooh my bloody gosh, keanu is so damn cute!! almost 40 yrs old and still so cute!! and the scene where he was holdin on to the cat to get to hell to check if isabel was in hell. wow wheee!! i wished i was THAT cat!! yes the one he was holding with his hands! the one sittin on his lap!! woo hoo!!! a-ok i betta stop here b4 sm poor underaged kid stumbles upon this. aniweas the movie was sooo B-grade!!! sorrie man as much as i love this guy, the script was pretty whacked up!

“Hold the door I’m going down. – Angela to Constantine, who’s in the lift at the hospital.” “Not if I can help it.” – Constantine to Angela as the lift foor closes.
“You’ve just ruined my designer shirt.” – Constantine to Midnight who tries to prevent him from using the chair.
“God is like a little kid with an ant farm” – Constantine
“I hope you will point me in the right direction. – Angela to Constantine. * Constantine then points to the doorway which she came from*”
“No need I know exactly where i’m going.” – Constantine to his doctor who tells him that he should mk arrangments since he’s gonna die.
“Got faith?” – a billboard
“your time is runnin out!…to get a Chevy!” – another stupid billboard
*keanu showin Lucifer the finger with dat dumbass look on his face” -damn crap man!

quite a few parts u kinda know wat wld happen b4 it happened. like him pointin to the door in response to angela’s qn. him showin lucifer the 3rd finger. and the moment he said he wld give up his life in exchange for isabel gg to heaven, i knew he was gonna go to heaven alrdy. so duhz lor the story, machiam like i aso wrote the script lydat. boo.

To be special

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Mon 21st Feb 2005

went back to the special sch today. it’s quite sad u knoe. like, a few ppl were quite surprised dat i went back even tho i had alrdy finished my compulsory 80 hrs. i guess it’s a normal thing to juz do wat u hv to do and nv look back, esp when it comes to comm svc. but i missed the kids, and of course the shuai malay teacher!! wahaha.

things were different alrdy, as alwayz with the passin of time. 3 of the kids were shifted to another class becos they were too old for the previous class – YC, Halim and Fitras. and one of the teachers aso shifted to another class liaoz.

nw the current class has quite a few new students as well, all of whom hv Downs Syndrome. it was pretty scary cos it was my first time interacting with DS kids. the previous students were all quite ‘tame’ and quiet mainly cos they couldnt speak at all. while the autistic kids durin the sunshine camp were juz physically tiring. but the DS kids were scary becos they were very temperamental. they were arguing abt reallie insignificant, trivial stuff, like who was the good kid and who was the naughty kid. well i guess to them it was important to be the good kid. so 2 of them had a huge fight. den the good fren of one of them started cryin aso. den the malay gal i was with started gettin upset and cowered in my lap. so u basically had like, 4 affected kids. so by the time they settled down and made up, it was time to go home! goodness, the patience of the teacher! u cant scold them cos they dun understand, but u cant let them hv their way as well cos u would spoil them. so u hv to try ur best to explain to them but smtimes they juz dun understand. i hate seein ppl fight, so it was scary seein them. i sat frozen and din knoe wat to do! the other volunteer alina said dat they were like that all the time. dunno how the teachers deal with it.

so i came away feelin quite impressed with the teachers. i mean, previously, the kids were difficult cos sm wouldn’t respond, and u had the normal naughty kids as well. but these DS kids were realie so different from the previous batch! and the teachers juz handled it so well. and the other teacher who got transferred to another class, i was quite impressed as well. her new class consists of students who reallie cant respond at all. no talkin, mebbe smtimes juz actions onli. so she reallie had to think of ways to get their attention and get them to respond. which isnt reallie easy.

went over to the other class to see the 3 transferred students. saw YC. i always feel sad to see him. he looks different now, mebbe it’s the shorter hair, mebbe he looks more grown up now. but yet he still cant respond. still cant eat on his own. still needs his mother. saw Halim aso. another one which i feel reallie sad abt. his mother passed away last yr of cancer as well. he was extremely close to his mother cos his mother alwayz tks care of him as well. so i asked his maid, who was in the class with him, hw he is. she said he still calls for his mother and is unable to comprehend dat she has died. hw sad is dat? knowin dat your mother is not around you, yet not knowin why and not understandin wat death is. and he cant speak too, so i reallie duno how he feels or wat is gg on in his mind. sm of these kids who cant speak and smtimes onli juz respond thru actions, you really wonder wat they are thinkin abt. do they know they are different? do they feel different? do they want to do smthin abt it? do they think abt the future? basically juz wat do they reallie think abt?

ya aniwaes on a lighter note, i liked gg back to the special sch aft a long while. cos they alwayz say i look lost weight and look prettier!! wahaha! and alina said she wanted to introduce me to her son!! eh dun praypray man, her son is quite eligible one leh. but i think he’s attached lah hehe.

when i dun go back, i can convince myself dat it’s bcos im busy, i hv no time, even tho i feel a teensy weensy bit guilty. when i do go back, i feel like i wanna keep gg back to help them out. wonder if i shld go back durin my free days?

Last wkend

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Sat 19th Feb 2005

wah had free lunch today!! tho i din deserve it and felt reallie guilty abt it. was supposed to meet the lady from the FSC, accompany her to fetch the old folks to the sch for lunch, den fetch them back home. BUT i got the bus direction wrong, so KW and i went the wrong way! and we were late! in the end, we met her str at the same and she went ALONE to pick up the old folks. double paiseh!!

den there was reallie nothin much to do. the old folks sat at their table eatin. so me and KW juz sit and eat aso while the lady had to do back to the FSC to dismiss the pre-sch kids. wah the lunch was great man! had yu sheng, den sm ginseng chicken/buddha jump over the wall kinda stuff, den wu xiang/prawn balls, steamed fish, roasted pig, kong bak pau, steamed prawns, and my craved or-nee!!so happy to eat it!! but i din eat a lot of it leh, paiseh to tk so much and by the time i wanted to tk sm more, the waitress cleared the table liaoz. den got free flow of orange juice aso! actualli got one more dish, but i cant rem wat, cos i onli rem it was a 9 course lunch!!! so shiok rite?! den me and KW juz sat there and talk rubbish cos got nothin to do mah. so slack. well but at least i got to knoe KW a little betta. he’s an extremely nice guy aso, quite gentlemanly, tho crappy at times. he actually served me first and peeled a prawn for me k! dun praypray ah!

wahlau so guilty to juz go for free lunch. and the old folks din give us any trouble at all. aft the lunch, they still very cheerful, sm of them still chatted with us, and thanked us even tho we din do anythin!

missed the bowlin event tho. haha but im glad dat my frens won! so cool! too bad nv see it. and i missed the karaoke session too!! grr but not dat i wld sing lah but still.
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fibbing is good for health

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i enjoy lyin!! wahaha. not reallie like lying lying lah..juz telling a fib for fun. pull ppl’s legs haha.

yesterday went with sean for proj meetin and tried to fake adrian dat i’m in his corp proj grp. den he reallie believe leh!! he still say “good!” den still ask me hw come i nv turn up for classes. i say i pon lor..den he still say i zhai. wahahah. damn funny lah.

den today tried to fake ralph dat im aso in his tax class. gave the same reason dat i’ve been skippin lessons and bcos monday got test, so i scared and go today. he was so confused. i guess cos he reallie hasnt seen me for so long, and im not the kind to skip lessons. he even asked hw come im not in sum’s class and tkin the test on sat. haha den dat nick lah!! spoil the whole thing. he interrupt and say cut the crap. den spoil the whole illusion. think cos he kan cheong go makan cos he need to go class for test. aiya wasted. the look on ralph’s face was reallie priceless.

aiya feel like zzzz now. so tired these few days cos studyin for corp, but hvnt recovered all my lost slp yet. but waitin for Budget to start leh..muz see wats gonna happen..hope i dun fall aslp..but i suspect i will hahah

oh ya! hw i so worried/scared/irritated now. wat if i cant get my pwc internship? i’ll be so upset. i applied for personal tax. sean applied for corporate. and nick is in audit. if they both get and i dun, i’ll be so upset. i dun care if only one of them gets it, as long as at least one. so mean. okie lah of course best is hope they both get leh..and hope i get aso!! shite man. juz realised today dat my sch may not fwd my resume to them cos i alrdy finished my official internship. shit man. wat is so wrong with gaining experience?! why are u not givin me a fair chance?! why u fair to those ppl, but not fair to me?! sm more now so little places. keep the dec ones for them lah!! ok im bein evil but still. :eek1

Corpse Reporting!

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Things that made me smile on Tues:

1) J saying that i’m scared of R. harlow u siao ah?! wat a ridiculous notion!!
2) R askin me to stay back for another 5 more hrs so he can send me home. haha siao ah! even tho i gian a lift home but i wun wanna wait for 5 hrs for u to finish ur marketin lesson lor!! but i appreciated the offer lah haha :grin1
3) crappy convo with xn. actualli cos i was talkin crap and she was juz listenin haha
4) crappy convo with sean.
5) less den 12 hrs b4 the end of the killer test (corp reporting quiz 2) less den 12 hrs to freedom.

soooo..ya. the test was crap. actualli i was so nervous b4 dat. guess i was juz scared. Nick says hv to get over the fear of corp but its like so damn difficult lah. before that, i couldnt eat my dinner. dunno how i walked out of the door but i spilled mocha on my sweater. felt like puking. but when i went into the test venue, i felt okie liaoz. kinda like, resigned to my fact? haha know dat im doomed to fail?

first qn was juz retrospective restatements which was quite okie. i finished it quite fast and i was wonderin whether it was correct since it’s worth like 18 marks!! if i get it wrong i wld kill myself.

second qn was forex. which was so damn screwed. wahlau. i studied lor. and i even practised the homework!! but his forex qn is so different from the txtbk homework lah!! so much more chim. den i din hv time to reallie think properly. anyhow juz whack. hai. suspect it’s wrong.

third qn lagi best. best qn of all. wth. initially juz cal 3 ratios onli. shit i hope i got the formulae and numbers rite. den muz do proportionate consol. shit i hate myself for this. cos i sorta practised the hw..but i wasnt reallie familiar with it leh..so canot do.. so if u cant consol properly, subsequent ratios and analysis sure kns. which was wat happened to me lor. i think if i not tkin under ProfL but under ProfO, he will sure give me marks for wat i had written. but i think ProfL not as nice man. shite.

mcq still okie. juz hope no wrong cos den will minus 1 mark!! so strict!! worse den GTH!!

wah and u knoe the best thing? when prof told us abt the test sm wks ago, he said 7.15-9.15 mah..so 2 hrs rite? so i went in thinkin yay! 2 hrs. can. so i steady slowly think properly and try to do. i kept lookin at my watch and thinkin still got time so can think so more. den the TA said 10 mins left. I was like WTF. seriously it was WTF. cos i hadnt even done my proportionate consol cos i dunno hw to do!! like 18marks for dat leh!! plus the ratios and analysis so another like 6 marks?! siao man. so i kan cheong kan cheong anyhow pull out numbers from nowhere and whack into a new consol statement. except dat my balance sheet canot balance. wth. so pissed. dun care lor. no time liaoz juz anyhow whack. analysis anyhw smoke lor. luckily he gave us another 5 mins ah. if not, sure kns.

so much for Nick sayin he would let me copy my fren’s work if he invigilate me. haha. he did come into my room in the end, but there was the other TA around and the prof came in periodically lor. and prof even split us up lor! so strict!! first time i experienced this. so aso canot copy lah. not dat i would lah. but still.

so drained aft the test. i din feel like doin anythin even tho i was super tired and had a headache and super hungry. ehhh i xin teng leh, nick got whole day class lagi worse haha. ven convinced me to go home myself so i took an even longer time to reach home. ya but reallie glad dat it’s over.

i went in prepared to die, and i already died. so im quite okie lah. haha i mean, i din hope for anythin lor. and im juz glad its over. no more corp quizzes! and nick says i did quite well for the first quiz. so not so bad lah..at least hope can pull up abit lor. now left the corp proj. damn xiong lor. sat in durin sean’s corp meetin today and their qn, tho not as jiak lat, is alrdy quite bad. and my grp hasnt even met!! and there’s so much to do. shit man. i can foresee dat i sure hv to stay in sch till past midnite to finish up this proj. luckily no other projs due at the end of the term liaoz. but now i hv to go do my fantastic 4 journals and 1 term paper for work&family. muz do well for this leh..it’s like the best way to pull up ur grades lor.
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unhealthy obsession

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ooh i hadnt realised dat my previous entry was my 100th entry!!

aiya! i juz sneezed and XXX came online!! haha i hope it doesnt mean anythiN. yucks man!!

aniweas..so unhealthy!! i juz finished eatin brownies!!! haha cos Jie’s classmates and gf made for him..den he got too much and cmi so me and Mei ate them up wahahhaa. hw come i dun rem NY gals bein so onz and bakin stuff for vday ah? haha mebbe cos we all dunno how to bake or juz din care. he got so much stuff from his classmates!! wassup with youths nowadays man? so much time rite? no need study ah? too much money to burn issit?! but watever, i feel satisfied now hahahha. aiyo jiak lat..still hvnt finished corp sia..and i feel like slpin liaozzzzzzz

depressin day man. not bcos i had to spend it studyin for the killer test instead of gg out and celebrating but cos i spent the time thinkin of 2 ppl. hm NNF and XN lor.

felt so pained for NNF, and i din knoe how to help him. as in, i cant be more pro-active lor. the best i could do was listen and suggest ways and encourage him. but cant reallie help him cos im not super close to the gal. he sounded so..helpless, tired, depressed; i dunno how to describe it. mebbe cos he’s a guy? haha but ya..dunno why juz realie felt pained for him. mebbe becos it reallie seems very hopeless for him liaoz leh..but yet i cant share with any1 else cos no1 is supposed to knoe. haha i sorta wrangled the secret out from him. quite surprised dat he was so willin to share with me. i guess it’s bcos if even sm1 like me know, when i’m not even close to him b4, it’s not much of a secret anymore rite? ya but i promised him i wun say..so i’m not even usin his real initials here cos im paranoid haha. i think i shld ask his gd fren to help him lor..but mebbe i shldnt interfere? cos i dun think he even ask his gd fren to help him, so why shld i do it? but his gd fren is the best person for the job cos he’s very close to the gal..mebbe i’ll talk to his gd fren aft wed.

as for XN..hai..wat do u do with jerks? u cant even beat them up. tk shoe and beat paper effigy ah? i aso dunno wat to say cos it’s up to her liaoz. and being a guo lai ren, all i can say is it tks time lor. but she’s takin it a lot harder den i expected her to. and i reallie din knoe wat to say, and it sux whenever i cant be there in person for her. and this is not even the first time. i wished i din hv the killer test, i hv a car, i can fly. watever. juz anythin so i cld be with her whenever she needs sm1. i suddenly thought dat every gal muz be supposed to meet one asshole in her lifetime man. haha except dat i think dat other ppls’ a**holes are so much worse. such as XN’s one. reallie a big, farking, irritatin, idiotic, low-life scum, scum-eating, bottom of the bucket sucker who shldnt be on this earth. okie im bein evil and this is bad for my karma. but he realli sux man.

okie lah..i betta go and get sm more studyin done. shit man. so little time left. clock’s tickin and i still got so much left. shite. hw hw hw i muz try to do well, muz try for css!! everybody, i hope u guys had a great vday!!